The Eulogy of a Girl Who Was Too Afraid

Ballerina II

“Ballerina II.” Image taken by Gerald Pereira: https://www.flickr.com/photos/geraldpereira/5539667446

She was just a girl who was too afraid to live life. So she stayed in her cocoon never to realize her full potential as a beautiful butterfly. She could’ve been a designer, photographer, writer,  filmmaker, and dancer with her her own multimedia company and fashion line.

She could’ve traveled the world as a dancer. She could’ve just been herself and by being herself she could’ve healed and liberated others.

But now she is gone.

She was a pretty good employee. She had health insurance, a 401(k) plan,  food, shelter, and a good secure job.

She was a hard-working employee, but she never got to create her art through clothing, through beautiful curtains that furnished the home of a single-mother, through designs that laced the walls and floors as children’s steps ran through the halls, or even through greeting cards that were sent to a friend on her graduation day.

She was a good employee, but she never created her film that captured the complexities, suffering, and beauty of human being asking the hard questions and who dared to live as her ancestors, predecessors, and spiritual mothers and fathers lived: with courage, curiosity, honor, compassion, and justice, while always in search of truth, wisdom, beauty and excellence.

She was a good employee, but she never got to dance on a real stage with music that moved humanity to a state of ecstasy and revealed her in her spirit and in her glory.

This girl had many dreams in her, but she was too afraid. She was more afraid of being broke  than creating beauty and meaning through all forms of art: dance, writing, photography, and music.

She was more afraid of being another disappointment than expressing her creative spirit.

She did not die of old age. She did not die of a disease.

She simply died of being to afraid too live.

© 2015 Sandy Gordon. All rights reserved.

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